4 In 1 Operations And A Somewhat Unusual Ugly Knee

Today I had my 6 week post operation check up at Stanmore Hospital and I finally got to meet Mr Miles (my surgeon)... the famous squash player.. I sort of chose my own surgeon as I googled who was able to provide the surgery that I needed and was drawn to Mr Miles as his profile said that he played squash. Unfortunately, he doesn't play as much as he used to due to his dodgy knee😂 plus having to work some evenings. I did have a little chuckle to myself with my 2 dodgy knees and the fact that they have not ruled out playing squash in the future. Most people don't return to squash due to psychological reasons rather than the physical ability to play. I have already told myself... well when I snapped the ACL and cartilage in my other leg playing rugby that didn't prevent me from playing rugby or squash so now it is about developing the muscles in my legs so that I can get back to playing some form of sport.

Don't worry....... I know this is going to be a long and lengthy process as the graft sites are really vulnerable and I cannot partake in anything that is likely to risk the grafts moving and not holding.

I was asked how I was doing. Not too bad I told him, bit gutted that I haven't got the 90 degree bend that the schedule said I was supposed to be aiming for by week 6.... This is fast approaching as I am on Week 5 and 5 days... not though I am counting or anything. Don't worry he says I am not expecting you to be as you had 4 in 1 operations... Have I?? That's news to me I thought I only had 3. Nope I had to do some more work to your cartilage whilst I was there.. I think this is probably from where I tripped over my bag at work and twisted my knee just after my last MRI scan.. This may  probably explain why one of the holes in my bones was bigger than what they thought.

He looked at my knee and says oh we shall have a look at that.... referring to the last stitch that I have poking out of my knee... he gives it a little tug and says.. right I will be back in a moment, I shall just go and get somethings and we shall have that out today.. It's only been the last couple of days that that particular site has started to look as though it is healing. Previously you could see the hole opening up and closing whenever I have had to carry out my physio exercises.

Today's check-up is mainly about how I am feeling and how the scars are healing. I inform him that my bend is 56 degrees which he is happy with.. I am reminded that the operations I have had are quite big and that it will take a long time to be fully recovered and the exercises are gentle as he does not want the grafts to be displaced. There is no way of knowing at this stage as to whether they have been successful and I won't know until after 6 months. Due to the great progress I am making... I inform him my sick note runs out on 10.11.17 and checked that I could go back to work... This was short lived... No you will probably need at least another 2 weeks minimum. Actually what do you do for a living again. I explain what I do and then the blow comes... No you can't return to work. I do not want you to be put in any vulnerable or risky situations. Plus you can't drive yet or bend your knee enough...

Initially this came as a bit of a shock as in my eyes I am progressing really well and see the differences from the start of my physio sessions so thought I would be allowed to go back. It's costing me a fortune being off work as I keep buying 'things' online. However, I have made a good purchase... OK yes one of these is a work related book but it's perfect as I have loads of time to read it and now that I am no longer on loads of painkillers the information will actually be processed. I have also treated myself to Level 1 and Level 2 British Sign Language course... I have given up on Portuguese for the time being... sorry Jorge.

Mr Miles explains that he can't do the normal tests for the ACL reconstruction due to the grafts. I was asked if I had any concerns and I informed him I was worried about this big dent that I have in my knee. Oh yes... You will have that.. it's due to muscle wastage but we have to go slowly in building those up... yup you got it... due to the grafts. Don't worry he says you will get it back. Then he says... oh you are going to be left with a somewhat unusual ugly knee... Then he looks at the other one and implies 1 and a half!! Commenting that I am going to have a big scar... Mind you... I am not quite sure what good looking knee looks like.

I am not worried about the scar especially if it means that I am going to be pain-free and able to return to sport. I have missed it so much it's unreal. Sport for me has always been my form of relaxation. Squash has taken on a therapeutic role over the years. My job at times can be really stressful and when I was a child I remember my coach telling me pretend the ball is someone's head that has annoyed you. So at times of frustration I have hacked the ball on my own to blow away the stresses. At other times, I have gone for a run down the beach with Petra (my dog) and just 'dumped' the emotional baggage along the way.

I also mentioned the sharp ripping sensation I get in my knee every now and again. Mr Miles explains about the ACL graft and where it is and that this is the reconstruction stretching. A massive sigh of relief is given as this is the same sensation I used to get in my other leg when my ACL was ripping!!

So in all today has been yet another positive day and lots of reassurance was given. I have informed a couple of my team mates that I am going to be off work longer than I had anticipated. They have been really really supportive which is making it easier for me as I was feeling guilty that they are struggling as technically we are currently two members down. Both of them have told me not to rush back and to look after myself as it is not worth damaging my knee.... Don't worry I have no intentions of doing this especially after talking to one lady today. She has had two operations on one leg and one on the other. Both times she has damaged her legs after surgery. I was completely shocked that one of them she damaged 4 hours after her surgery. At times, it is scary when you have to go outside in the rain or worried that you are going to slip when you get up to go to the toilet during the night or get knocked by someone when you go out.. not though I have been out much.

I am just taking one day at a time and making steady progress everyday.